Questions to ask kids that get more than a shrug

The best questions to ask kids are specific enough to bring a real memory to mind. Instead of asking, "How was your day?" try asking what made them laugh, who they sat with at lunch or what surprised them.

These 120 questions are for parents talking with their own children, ages 4 to 10. You'll find ideas for the ride home, dinner, bedtime and those quiet moments when your child seems ready to talk. Pick one or two, give your child time and enjoy where the conversation goes.

24 questions to ask kids after school

The school pickup question can become a daily habit, but "What did you do today?" often gets the same answer: "Nothing." Honestly, your child has spent hours moving between lessons, friends, lunch and play. Asking about one small part of that day gives them somewhere to start.

Try these questions on the walk home or while your child has a snack. You don't need to ask all 24. Choose one that sounds interesting and let your child take the conversation in their own direction.

• What made you laugh today?
• Who did you play with at recess?
• What was the funniest thing someone said?
• What did you eat for lunch?
• What was the easiest thing you did today?
• Was anything harder than you expected?
• What game did you play outside?
• Did you learn a new word?
• Who did you help today?
• Did anyone help you with something?
• What made you feel proud?
• What was the quietest part of your day?
• Did anything surprise you?
• What did your teacher say that you remember?
• What would you change about today?
• Who made you smile?
• What was your favorite part of recess?
• Did you make anything today?
• What would you like to show me from school?
• Was there a moment you felt brave?
• What did you wish you had more time to do?
• What is one thing you want to tell me?
• If you could repeat one part of today, what would it be?
• What are you looking forward to tomorrow?

24 fun questions to ask kids at dinner

Dinner is a good time for conversation because nobody has to stop what they're doing to sit down for a serious talk. Keep the mood light. A funny answer about an imaginary restaurant can turn into a story everyone at the table enjoys.

We like the idea of putting conversation starter cards in a small bowl on the dinner table. Let each person pick one question, including the adults. Your child should hear you answering, too. That makes the activity feel like a family conversation rather than another set of questions from a parent.

• If you could invent a new ice cream flavor, what would it be?
• What would you name a restaurant you owned?
• If our family had a mascot, what animal would it be?
• What is the funniest food combination you can imagine?
• If you could eat one dinner every day for a week, what would it be?
• What would you cook for a famous person?
• If vegetables could talk, which one would be funniest?
• What food would you never put on a pizza?
• If you opened a bakery, what would you sell?
• What would you put in a giant sandwich?
• Would you rather eat breakfast for dinner or dinner for breakfast?
• What is the silliest name for a soup?
• If you could invite three people to dinner, who would you choose?
• What would our family restaurant look like?
• If you had to eat a meal using only a spoon, what would you choose?
• What food smells better than it tastes?
• What would you name a new kind of fruit?
• If you could make a giant birthday cake, what would it look like?
• What is one food you want to try?
• Would you rather have crunchy pancakes or soft cookies?
• What would happen if dinner suddenly turned blue?
• If you could create a new holiday food, what would it be?
• What is the funniest thing that could happen at dinner?
• What should we make together this weekend?

24 conversation starters for kids in the car

Car rides give you a few minutes together without the usual distractions at home. You can ask a question while driving, then let your child think before answering. Some children talk more easily when they aren't looking directly at you.

These questions work for short trips to school and longer weekend drives. If your child is looking out the window, use what they notice as a starting point. You don't need to fill every quiet moment.

• If we could drive anywhere today, where would you go?
• What is the strangest thing you've seen on a road?
• If our car had a name, what would it be?
• Would you rather travel through a forest or across a desert?
• What would you pack for a trip to the moon?
• If you could choose our next family day out, where would we go?
• What animal would make the funniest bus driver?
• If you could design a road, what would it look like?
• Would you rather ride in a submarine or a hot air balloon?
• What would you do if we found a secret tunnel?
• Which place would you like to visit with me?
• If you could bring one toy on a long trip, what would it be?
• What would you name a new planet?
• Would you rather have a treehouse or a secret underground room?
• What do you think that building is used for?
• If you could invent a flying car, what would it look like?
• What three things would you take to a deserted island?
• If we got lost in a friendly town, what would we do?
• What would you like to see through a giant telescope?
• Would you rather explore a castle or a cave?
• What song should be our family road trip song?
• If you could stop time for one hour, what would you do?
• What would make our next trip really special?
• If you could take me anywhere, where would we go first?

24 questions to ask kids at bedtime

Bedtime conversations often bring out things your child didn't mention during the day. The house is quieter, the lights are low and there is less pressure to give a quick answer. Keep your voice calm and leave room for a longer story.

You might hear about a playground disagreement, a small worry or something your child is excited about tomorrow. Don't rush to fix every problem. Sometimes your child needs you to listen first.

• What was your happiest moment today?
• What made you feel loved today?
• Did anything make you feel worried?
• What are you proud of yourself for?
• What would you like to dream about tonight?
• Who would you like to thank today?
• What is something kind someone did for you?
• What is something kind you did for someone?
• When did you feel brave today?
• What would you like to get better at?
• What made you feel safe today?
• Was there anything you wanted to tell me but didn't?
• What is one thing you wish grown-ups understood?
• What made you feel excited today?
• If tomorrow could be perfect, what would happen?
• What is something you learned about yourself?
• What is one thing you want to try tomorrow?
• Who would you like to spend more time with?
• What is something you find difficult right now?
• What is your favorite memory from this week?
• What do you think makes someone a good friend?
• What is something you want to learn when you grow up?
• What is one thing you are thankful for today?
• What would you like us to do together tomorrow?

24 silly what-if questions kids love

Sometimes the easiest way to get a child talking is to ask something completely ridiculous. There is no right answer, and your child doesn't have to remember anything from school or explain how their day went.

These fun questions to ask kids are especially good when everyone is tired or conversation has gone quiet. Let your child make up the rules. If their answer leads to an even sillier question, follow it.

• What if your teddy bear could talk for one day?
• What if you woke up with a dinosaur in your backyard?
• What if every animal could speak the same language?
• What if you could turn invisible for an hour?
• What if your shoes could take you anywhere?
• What if you were the teacher for a whole day?
• What if it rained chocolate instead of water?
• What if you could live inside a giant tree?
• What if your pet became the president?
• What if you could swap places with a grown-up?
• What if your bedroom floated in the sky?
• What if you could invent a new animal?
• What if your toys had a secret party at night?
• What if you could breathe underwater?
• What if you had a robot that did one job for you?
• What if you could shrink down to the size of an ant?
• What if your family lived in a castle?
• What if you could choose the weather every morning?
• What if you found a door to a magical world?
• What if you could give everyone a new superpower?
• What if you had a pet dragon?
• What if your lunchbox could make any food you wanted?
• What if you could visit the year 3000?
• What if you could make one impossible thing happen?

Questions parents ask

What are good questions to ask kids about their day?

Ask about one specific moment, such as what made them laugh, who they played with or what they found difficult. These questions are easier to answer than the general question, "How was your day?"

How do I get my child to talk more?

Choose a relaxed moment, ask one question and give your child time to answer. Share your own answer, too, and avoid asking several questions in a row.

What age can children answer conversation starter questions?

Children around age 4 can answer simple questions about things they remember or enjoy. Older children, especially those ages 7 to 10, may enjoy questions about opinions, imaginary situations and personal experiences.